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Sunday 25 December 2011

Qiu Jin Poetry

Autumn wind, autumn rain — they make one die of sorrow.

Qiu Jin Asking

forthright. When she happened to meet benighted ones, she would confront them head-on, leaving little room for compromise. People often held this against her. Some even compared her to Sophia [Perekovskaya] and Madame Roland. She would answer [to such appellations] without much thought.
(Quoted in Hu Ying, “Writing Qiu Jin’s Life: Wu Zhiying and Her Family Learning,” Late Imperial China, December 2004)

Qiu Jin Voice

We women, who have had our feet bound from early childhood, have suffered untold pain and misery, for which our parents showed no pity. Under this treatment our faces grew pinched and thin, and our muscles and bones were cramped and distorted. The consequence is that our bodies are weak and incapable of vigorous activity, and in everything we do we are obliged to lean on others.
Being thus necessarily dependent on external aid, we find ourselves, after marriage, subjected to the domination of men, just as though we were their household slaves. All our energies are confined to the home, where we are occupied in cutting out clothes, cooking and preparing food, making tea and boiling rice, sprinkling and sweeping, waiting on our husbands, and handing them basin and towel.
In any important business we are prevented from taking the least part. Should a guest arrive, we are obliged to make ourselves scarce and hide in our private apartments. We are not allowed to inquire deeply into any subject, and should we venture to speak at any length in reply to some argument, we are told that our sex is volatile and shallow.
My sisters, do you know where the fault lies that has brought us to this pass? It is all due to women’s lack of energy and spirit. We ourselves drew back in the first instance, and by-and-by that came to be regarded as an immutable rule of conduct.
Sisters, let us today investigate the causes which have led to this want of spirit and energy among women. May it not be because we insist on binding up our girls’ feet at an early age, speaking of their “three-inch golden lilies” and their “captivating little steps”? May it not be, I say, that this process of foot-binding is what has sapped and destroyed all our energy and spirit?
Today my blood is up, and I want to stir your blood as well, my sisters, and rouse you to a sense of your degradation. All women should, in the first place, refuse to adorn themselves with paint and powder, or trick themselves out in seductive guise, realizing that every human being has his own natural countenance given to him by God … In bringing forward this question of unbound feet, my sisters, I want you to realize that the result of having feet of the natural size will be to abolish the evils attendant on injured bones and muscles and an enfeebled constitution — surely a cause for unbounded rejoicing. …
If one day we succeed in wiping out this horrible blot on our civilization, our bodies will begin to grow stronger, and the steps we take in walking will become a pleasure instead of a pain. Having thus regained their natural energy, the whole sex will progress without difficulty, and an endless store of happiness will be built up for thousands of generations of women yet unborn.
But if you shrink from this reform, and wish to retain the pretty sight of small feet beneath your petticoats, you will remain imprisoned to the end of the chapter in the seclusion of your inner apartments, quite devoid of any strength of character, and it will be impossible to manifest the native brilliancy of the female sex. … Let there be thorough enlightenment on the subject of foot-binding, and progress in the matter of equal rights for men and women will surely follow.

Qiu Jin in Tokyo, 1904

We sisters must learn to put aside everything we have preoccupied ourselves with before and focus on what we must do for our future — as if our former selves are dead and we have returned to this world in other forms of humanity.

Sunday 30 October 2011

Cipanas, looking for little monkey
















Nice weekend and see nature from above place

See Ocean

Happy Jumping
With "Nyai"

Different Genre
Pinggir Pantai
Depan Kamar

That's very a lot of stuff had to do, but more than that....I need escaped....go to see ocean in the afternoon with my daughter, find the Ocean's Queen and sands. Onather experience that we can't forget.

Saturday 5 February 2011

Puzzle Box



Sudah lebih dari 3 hari aku terbaring di atas bed putih yang tinggi, jauh dari jangkauan kaki mungilku. Setiap pagi dan sore, kupingku di jepit alat untuk diambil darahnya...pemeriksaan rutin suhu badan dan tekanan darah, terakhir, 1 pirng kecil obat. Aku harus menginap di rumah sakit karena demam berdarah. Di kamar itu aku sendiri, kadang bosan juga tidak boleh turun dari tempat tidur, tidak boleh bermain, hanya duduk dan tidur saja. Kaki kecilku tertutup selimut garis-garis hingga lutut...sore hari adalah waktu yang aku tunggu. Pengunjung berlalu-lalang di depan kamarku, langkah kaki tergesa-gesa ingin segera tiba di kamar yang akan dikunjungi. Aku suka bertemu orang-orang itu, beberapa orang menengokkan kepalanya ke arah kamarku, dan aku tersenyum. Wajah baru setiap sore.

Sore ini ada yang berkunjung di kamarku, serombongan ibu-ibu teman kantor mama yang datang, menjenguk aku yang sakit. Ada banyak oleh-oleh yang aku terima, roti marie regal, wafer nissin chocolate, biscuit monde dan buah jeruk. Khas bawaan pengunjung. Aku sibuk melihat kaleng kaleng biscuit dan tidak memperhatikan apa yang dibicarakan ibu-ibu itu. Mereka bicara dengan mama yang sudah datang lebih dulu. Kulihat ke arah luar, masih banyak orang lalu lalang. Taman hijau di depan kamarku juga mulai terlihat banyak pengunjung yang melintasinya. Seorang ibu memanggil sebuah nama, aku lupa itu siapa, memanggil dan mengajaknya masuk, "Mas, sini, katanya mau kasih sendiri. Ayo masuk." Aku melihat ke arah pintu, anak laki-laki kecil membawa kotak kecil bergambar binatang kartun. Warnanya menarik. "Ayo kasihkan, bilang semoga lekas sembuh." Anak itu diam dan menyodorkan kotak itu ke arahku. Aku bilang terima kasih dan mulai memperhatikan kotaknya. Mainan. Aku membukanya dan kulhat ada 9 box keil bergambar yang terbolak balik. Mana gambarnya. Aku keluarkan satu persatu. "Bisa mainnya?" anak itu bertanya, aku menggelengkan kepala. "Sini aku ajarin, sigap dia membuka lembar-lembar gambar dari dalam box. "Mau yang mana? Gambarnya?". Mataku tertuju ke gambar kelinci putih yang memegang wortel oranye. Kutunjuk gambar itu, "Yang ini ya? Lihat dulu warna belakangnya, hijau kan?" Dia mulai menjelaskan. "Dibalik dulu warna yang sama, begini." Aku cermat memperhatikan. Tangannya yang kecil sibuk membalik box-box itu dan terkumpullah warna yang sama. "Nah sekarang tinggal atur" Anak itu mengaturnya dalam tempat boxnya dan sebentar, tampaklah gambar kelinci seperti gambar contoh. "Udah ngerti?" Aku mengangguk. "Sekarang coba yah. Ayo." segera dibongkar 9 box itu dan berantakan lagi warnanya. Dia meminta aku mengulangi apa yang tadi dijelaskan. Kucoba satu-satu, perlahan dan dia nggak sabar. "Nih, warnanya sama. Ini juga" Tapi aku tetap melakukannya sendiri. Lebih lambat, tapi aku mengerti cara bermainnya. "Nah, bisa kan. Yang lain juga begitu, yah". Aku menganggukkan kepalaku lagi.

Ruanya sebagian ibu-ibu sudah meninggalkan ruangan hendak pulang. Mereka berpamitan pada mamaku. Seorang ibu mengajak anak laki-laki itu pulang. "Tapi adiknya belum bisa main semuanya, bu. Sebentar ya" Jawabnya. Ibu itu menunggu di luar, tak berapa lama, mengajaknya pulang lagi, "Ayo mas, nanti di tinggal mobilnya". Anak laki-laki itu masih belum mau beranjak dari samping tempat tidurku. "Besok lagi ya mas." Ibu itu menjanjikan kunjungan berikutnya. "Benar lho, ibu janji besok ke sini lagi. Aku mau ajari adiknya lagi. Benar ya." Ibunya tertawa mengiyakan. "Aku pulang dulu ya, besok aku ajarin lagi gambar yang lainnya, yah" dan rombongan pengunjung kamarku keluar dari kamarku. Dan kamarku sepi.

Kutimang-timang mainan box lucu itu. Kulihat kembali gambar-gambar contohnya. Aku menunggunya esok hari untuk mengajarkan gambar yang lain. Meskipun esok dan esoknya lagi, dia nggak pernah masuk berkunjung lagi hingga aku pulang ke rumah.


Saturday 8 January 2011

Like candle in the dark


In a year full of joy with you...
fill my emptiness site in my heart...
killing my lonely soul...


looks time will different untill next...
when I miss u desperately...
I feel pain too inside of me...
couldnt hold in mine and I make tears drop on my cheeks...

and I feel lonely